Feeling Irate and helpless!!!

Ok, so I decided to seize my destiny (so to speak) and track down the financial aid office and demand they do something about giving me my money. Ha ha, didn't exactly work that way. I had to ask a woman in a building for directions to the financial aid office, and it turns out it was right around the corner. So I get there, and the receptionist asks what I need, I drop a couple names of women who I have dealt with, and say that I have no money and am sick of waiting around, so could I please speak with one of the women to get my money? She sends out Kelly, who I spoke with on Friday when I signed my loan checks. Apparently, it is out of the university's hands, since the checks are in the bank, so they are just waiting to hear from the bank. Of course I start to cry, mostly in anger in frustration, but of course a little sadness too. I say how ridiculous it is that I have done EVERYTHING I needed to do on my end, and this process has taken months, and every couple of weeks something else pops up!!! She said another student came by this morning with the same problems, and I could get a quick emergency loan to last me through the weekend. I of course tell her that is ridiculous, I shouldn't HAVE to get ANOTHER loan, I should get the money from the loans I ALREADY have! She proceeds to tell me it is no big deal, and if I get one, I can just pay them back next week when I get my actual loan money. She even offers to call them for me. She assures me that the money will get here by Wednesday next week, and I reply that she told me Friday that the money would be here THIS week, so how am I to trust that it will really get here next week? She just kept assuring me that an emergency was no big deal, and encouraging me to do that. I told her I would think about it. Fundamentally I don't feel comfortable getting another loan, no matter how small or easy. I am still crying throughout all of this, which is pissing me off even more, but oh well. Kelly also tells me that the checks arrived later than usual this year, and they are taking longer than normal. I just get the feeling that they take their sweet time, which the British seem to like to do (which is normally a-ok with me, but not when it comes to my survival!). At the end I ask what the news is on my private loan that she was supposed to check into, but no one has gotten back to me. I corresponded with Sallie Mae two days ago, and I was assured that I had done everything I needed to do, it was just up to the university to approve it and make final arrangements. Apparently the university has no knowledge of this loan, so Kelly assured me she would look into it again. BAHHHHHH!!!!

So I left, feeling very angry, frustrated and very hot (since I was all worked up). I decided to walk back to my room, and just suck it up for the weekend and not get the emergency loan. I almost called one of my parents, or Noah to cry and bitch, but realized it wasn't even 6am. Then I thought that all three of them would probably just tell me to check out the emergency loan, just in case. So I turned around and walked back to the first building I went to because Kelly told me that was where the emergency loans were given. So the first lady I spoke with had NO idea what I was talking about, and tried to send me somewhere else to the postgraduate school. Finally her co-worker overheard, and said she had just been alerted to the situation (which meant that Kelly called them and warned them about me!) and that I had to go to the bank to get some slip that they may or may not know about, and then fill it out, and then bring it back, and if I was lucky, someone would talk to me about it! They said to come back around 4pm, and maybe get things taken care of. I am now so pissed, that I am going to forget about it, and suck it up like I had originally planned. Incidentally, there was a plaque in that building that said Newcastle University was ranked 2nd in friendliest staff. They may have been friendly, but in no way were they helpful!

So in more tears, I walked back to my room. On a happier note, a guy in my program that is from the area invited a few of us over for dinner tonight. I am happy at the thought of free dinner, however I have to take the metro to get there, which will probably cost around 3 pounds, which 6 dollars. Oh well, I will pay it, and stuff my face when I get there!

I get back to my building, and decide to check the mail. For packages, you have to check a sheet at reception that lists every one's name that has a package. I saw my name, so asked the lady for my stuff. In a really pissy attitude, she asked my name and room number. You also have to sign for your stuff, so I asked if I should go ahead and sign, but apparently she didn't believe me when I said I had a package, so she rudely told me to wait. She then found my stuff, and said it was ok to sign. I wanted to jump over the counter and throttle her! She acted as if I was putting her out, but it's her f-ing job to get my f-ing mail! But I was very happy to see that my Aunt Beth had mailed me some books, and I got my new debit card for my new British bank! I was so happy to receive a package from home, I love you dearly Beth!!! I am also glad to have my new debit card, too bad my account only has 1 pound in it.

So now I feel like crap, and just want to forget this whole day happened. However, I will be responsible and do some reading for class, and perhaps send along some emails about my private loan, to try to get that going, since apparently I can't leave it to anyone to care but me!

On a positive note however, my grandma came out of surgery ok. I hear she is in a lot of pain, and recovery will be slow, but she appears to be ok. That is good news because I was a little worried about it yesterday since I wasn't there. And this morning, one of my lovely kitchen-mates shared some of his lunch with me. It was nice, we had a little chat and some Chinese noodles. And last night, Alissa came over to watch a movie since I had had a bad day. Yay for new friends abroad!